Should’ve Been Me
Producer
Well, I went through my list of friends and found
I had no one to tell
Of this overwhelming clean feeling
Strange serenity
[Pre-Chorus]
When I saw the girl looked just like me
And it broke my heart, the lengths you went to hold me
To get to have me, 'cause
[Chorus]
I haven't given you what you need
You wanted me, but couldn't reach me
So you went into your memory
Relived all the ways you still want me
I haven't given you what you need
You wanted me, but couldn't reach me
I'm sorry, it should've been me
[Verse 2]
I'd be going 'bout my day, until a hand
Would come and lift me out
And drop me in the middle of a labyrinth
Where I'd be stuck a while
When I saw the girl looked just like me, I thought
Must be lonely loving someone
Trying to find their way out of a maze
Oh, I know
[Chorus]
I haven't given you what you need
You wanted me, but couldn't reach me
So you went into your memory
Relived all the ways you still want me
I haven't given you what you need
You wanted me, but couldn't reach me
I'm sorry, it should've been me
I'm sorry, it should've been me
About
“Should’ve Been Me” is the ninth song from Mitski’s sixth album, Laurel Hell.
The song describes one of Mitski’s relationships and the isolation she felt as a consequence of poor communication on the part of her partner. However, throughout the song, she also repeatedly apologizes for being emotionally unavailable and detached from her partner.
More generaly, the track explores themes of grief, loneliness, and isolation, many of which have been recurring themes throughout Mitski’s discography, on songs such as “I Bet on Losing Dogs” and “Nobody”.
Q&A
Find answers to frequently asked questions about the song and explore its deeper meaning
This song is roughly about being cheated on but also understands why. I wanted to write a song about cheating that came from understanding and compassion and empathy. The thing is when you’re in a relationship, you get to know a person and you love a person fully for who they are. And you understand all of their flaws and their good side and their bad side. I think in a real relationship, a person doesn’t just become a villain because they did something wrong. The more I need forgiveness, the more open I become to forgiving. And I think I just need a lot of forgiveness and acceptance of myself, and that made me open to writing about forgiving other people. I just need to lighten the load and not have so much anger and shame and sadness. And I think forgiveness is the way to go for that.
— Mitski via Pitchfork Song x Song video (February 2022)
- 3.Stay Soft
- 4.Everyone
- 7.Love Me More
- 9.Should’ve Been Me
- 10.I Guess
- 11.That’s Our Lamp