{Intro}

Look, I was gonna play on peaceful mode as to not spawn any creepers
But I've got to make this video
Something's different, I can feel it
Just a feeling I've got, like something is about to get made fun of, but I don't know what
If that means what I think it means, this is gonna be hilarious
And if he's as carrots as you say, I'm not taking any chances
(You're just one of a kind)

{Chorus}

I'm beginning to feel like a craft god, craft god
All my people mine down to the bedrock, bedrock
Now who thinks they're cool enough for this sandbox, sandbox
They call me the god of Minecraft but I tell them that's Notch

{Verse 1}

But if Notch is a God does that make Jeb Jesus?
I'm an all star with a hotbar
Bombin' B-52s like a Rock Lobster
Get my back popped from that block posture
Makin' videos of how to make a minecart
Ever since Minecraft was not a culture
All the little children gettin' capes at MineCon
I'm a teacher, like your father
Tutorials like a field trip, and I'm your chauffer
Monsiuer, YouTube wallet, makin' profit

This parody, dare I say, isn't that hot
You don't really know how to make a piston stack
With this redstone-y track
Craftin' a path to the back
So the black rack smacks Jack crack in the sack
That's if he had nads
But I don't know, never asked about it
My dad slapped my bad habits like rabbits eat cabbage
But travesties savagely, they have to be happening
Rapidly, tragically can it be possibly magic, can it be?

Gotta realize I'm not iconic
Leave that to SethBling, he's better than me
But look at his icon, all he does is make redstone
That's beside the fact
Minecrafters makin' YouTube revenue
Here's a partnership
What's left but the ego trip
While new channels dismantled 'cause you can't hold a candle to StampyLongHead

{Chorus}

'Cause I'm beginning to feel like a craft god, craft god
All my people minin' to the bedrock, bedrock
Now who thinks they're cool enough for this sandbox, sandbox
Let me show you a time-lapse of a ship from Star Wars, Star Wars
Everybody wants to see their favorite Pokémon remade in this game as pixel art

{Verse 2}

To be truthful it's stupid
YouTube don't know where the views went
Haven't made you a new video since
Since you got schooled how to survive your first night by Paul Saures (Jr.)
Try to start a new channel now, it'd be useless, fruitless
Now that you've got Markiplier
Followed by a giant list of douches

See you got Sky and Lewis
SSundee, Bajan and Captain
Sparkles, Jerome, Ballistic, Syndicate, Slamacow, Ethos and DocM
But if they can then so can you
Be strong and use some persistence
You'll rule the MC and get invited to MineCon
And win a free ride on a pig
And ride it into the Nether and burst in a ball of flames
Or play with mods or build some stuff with friends
It's all the same when it comes to fame
They think it's just a game
'Till you ride a Diamond Minecart up the charts
Where people stand in line with swords to smell your farts

{Bridge}

So play little boy
Go play and create and create from June to May little boy
Consistency is everything, more than anything
From YouTube don't stray little boy
One day, "that boy's great" is what they say, little boy
You'll get a thumbs up, subscribers, revenue from your channel every day little boy
Hey little boy, what you make little boy?
YouTube doesn't let me say little boy
If you work hard, then you'll be rewarded, movin' forward
Put haters in their place little boy
Basically, boy, put yourself to the test
The rest falls in place as success little boy 'cause

{Chorus}

I'm beginning to feel like a craft god, craft god
All my people mine down to the bedrock, bedrock
The way I got my hair in my face, you can call me Deadlox, Deadlox
Make other channels sniff my crusty gym socks
Now sit back and let me show you some command blocks- ham hocks
Ham hocks?

{Verse 3}

Creepers out on you, they're homing
You bonehead, you just exploded
Your doom was pre-encoded
Tweet about it like Dinnerbone and
Sip on my lyric potion
I'm super rich with all these picks and all my gold is molten
Jacked up like Michael Bolton

I'm like a rapping Google, just rhyming out what parts are crucial
When it updates and you snapshot yourself in the foot
I get your views you tuna
You stink, my aroma is beautiful
Got you feelin' rueful, but I'm bein' useful, a nuisance
Producin' vids that get watched by kids so young
They don't get the message within
I got dumb lines to illustrate, entertain while I'm showin' off my designs
Got people linin' up in long lines
Loyal to me like I'm Ralph Fiennes
Craftin' fast to have the vid done and up by that deadline
Do it every time, 'cept that one time
But I'm king of the Overworld
Where I make things in a field of sunshine
Give you insight
Take you on a knowledge-building joyride
Desert dry you out like white wine
Now you can't walk in a straight line
Drink some milk, and just wait some time
The effect wears off, you'll be just fine
And primed to take flight in the sky
Aboard my flying rig, made of slime
Some of you whine the design's not mine but I add 1 and 2 like a plus sign
Watch me get away with it though 'cause Eminem got you on cloud nine

And fall down in a portal
Get Nether wart or knock a blaze down with a sword
And explore the pigman hordes
With a couple 'a torches, movin' forward
You see the lava to... fjord it
Wanna see my house, you can't afford it
So there's the door, go toward it

But now you see this is fantasy
'Cause my whole fanbase is make-believe
Got a lot of thoughts, I'm distraught
My plots are not hot enough to even make the shot
Man oh man, I need to be pumpin' out videos every day on my channel
So that is the plan, take it straight to the bank
Hope my future is great on YouTube now, I'll be a legend
Now I'm gonna show you how to really play Minecraft (here we go)

{Hook}

Imma show you how to be a builder of the kind of things that take creative player's names and put them all to shame
What they don't know is how to make a calculator or a mansion prob'ly couldn't even work their little head around a sandwich
Canvas blank, I see the future, watch your channel getting neutered, all my wolves are gonna make a meal of all your old YouTubers
All your animated skits and all your multi-million hits, you won't be missed
It's time to pull your weight, survival of the fittest, 'cause the gauntlet has been thrown
You let me get into my zone, I am the leader of the stone, now appoint me to my throne

"Oh he's too underground"
Well what do you expect?
He's startin' out and no one knows him
That was a pun, those are dumb
And no I don't condone them
Break rocks, redstone-o-clock
Put on dubstep and make a time-lapse
"I don't know how to make stuff like that"
"I don't know what blocks to use"
Let me know when it occurs to you that I've got a couple of video tutorials too
That will show you the way to make a mutton chop stew
While you wade through a river of crap with no canoe
Do that, an' report back, 'till then I'm just gonna have to bid you adieu

{Verse 4}

Hnng, ride donkeys, kill zombies
Look at the offspring of these two bunnies
Breedin' my horse for max jumping
I'm a villager salesmen, I sell coal for that emerald money
In summary, in case you were wondering
I speak to all and sundry
King inside the mountain
The towns are now bowin' down
I've run aground of stranger tides
From the desert to the ice, I'm your guide
You're on a ride that's designed to give entertaining advice
Like I'm the kind of guy you'd invite inside your mind
I'm tryna find the right rhyme time to mine, your diamonds worldwide

But if I could ever be anything, you see
All I'd ask is that I could still at least be me
But I need a release from the stress, tee hee
I don't really need to be an MC Emcee
But it's fun, like I'm stunned
Like a new life's begun
Take a deep breath in, and I'm ready to run
I'll build it all night, make a minecart ride
Show you how to build a house to take refuge inside
With the redstone tech shown, how to make a great bow
Sure to let your friends know that we got a great show
Pumpin' with adrenaline, throw out all the Ritalin
Tell boring YouTube channels that you're sick of them
Just do what I say, it's not that hard
Here's my favorite part
Stand up from your chair, put out your hands... and now you applaud