[Verse 1: Juice WRLD]
You know we getting cash, right?
Bad bitch, she gonna shake her ass, right?
I'm like, "Damn baby, where you from?
What's your name? You familiar, did I meet you in a past life?"
I can give you all this money if you act right
I'ma throw you all this money if you act right
I'ma throw you all this money if you act right, uh
I'ma throw you all this money if you act right
Then again I ain't paying for pussy, you rookie
Chopper on my hip and it's shooting, mm, mm
Ho, chopper on my hip and it's bad like Meagan Good
Bad little bitch, she gon' give me all of her cookies
Bad little bitch and she thick, looking like Snooki
Got a problem with me, I'ma shoot it like a movie, uh
That's just how it is
I'm Khalifa with the reefer but I've never been a Wiz
This is grown man shit, this is not for little kids
Even though I'm going hard like a nigga Littlе Bill
Got the molly in drink, I'ma crack a seal
Run up on me, you gеt popped like I'm popping all the pills
Spazzing on every track, I battlerap
Anyone that's gonna battlerap, come battle that
I feel like Shaquille O'Neal when I shoot
Chopper gonna break the glass, ratatat
I don't got time for snakes, no time for rats
I'm smoking pack, I'm selling crack, bring it back
Run up on me, cool, that chopper on me get you clapped
Matter of fact, I don't know how to act
I'm a real-ass nigga, drill-ass nigga
Go-and-pop-a-pill-ass nigga, real-ass nigga
Fuck how you feel, lil' nigga, I'm real, lil' nigga
I'm sick, I'm ill, lil' nigga, for real, lil' nigga, uh
Freestyle off the dome, kicking it for real
In the cut toting my steel like Keel
If you don't kill the motherfucker, fuck it, I will
You better start writing your will, for real

[Chorus: Eminem]
I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?
'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?

[Verse 2: Eminem]
Y'all act like you never seen a white person before
Jaws all on the floor like Pam like Tommy just burst in the door
And started whooping her ass worse than before
They first were divorced, throwing her over furniture (Agh!)
It's the return of the "Oh, wait, no way, you're kidding
He didn't just say what I think he did, did he?"
And Dr. Dre said… nothing, you idiots!
Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement (Ha ha!)
Feminist women love Eminem
"Chicka, chicka, chicka, Slim Shady, I'm sick of him
Look at him, walking around, grabbing his you-know-what
Flipping the you-know-who," "Yeah, but he's so cute though"
Yeah, I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose
But no worse than what's going on in your parents' bedrooms
Sometimes I wanna get on TV and just let loose
But can't, but it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose
"My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips"
And if I'm lucky, you might just give it a little kiss
And that's the message that we deliver to little kids
And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is
Of course, they're gonna know what intercourse is
By the time they hit fourth grade
They've got the Discovery Channel, don't they?
We ain't nothing but mammals—well, some of us, cannibals
Who cut other people open like cantaloupes
But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes
Then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope
But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote
Women, wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus, and it goes—

[Chorus: Eminem]
I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?
'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?

[Verse 3: Eminem]
Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell records (Nope)
Well, I do, so fuck him and fuck you too!
You think I give a damn about a GRAMMY?
Half of you critics can't even stomach me, let alone stand me
"But Slim, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird?"
Why, so you guys could just lie to get me here?
So you can sit me here next to Britney Spears?
Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs
So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst
And hear 'em argue over who she gave head to first
Little bitch put me on blast on MTV
"Yeah, he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim, hee-hee"
I should download her audio on MP3
And show the whole world how you gave Eminem VD (Agh!)
I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups
All you do is annoy me, so I have been sent here to destroy you
And there's a million of us just like me
Who cuss like me, who just don't give a fuck like me
Who dress like me; walk, talk and act like me
And just might be the next best thing, but not quite me

[Bridge: Juice WRLD]
I'm real Juice, yes, I'm the real Juice
You can get juiced up, you fucking with me, uh
Won't the real Juice WRLD please stand up?
Won't the real Juice WRLD please stand up?
Someone bring all the real Xans out
This fentanyl shit got me laying on the couch
Like, what the fuck is all these fake pills about?
What the fuck is all these fake thrills about?

[Verse 4: Juice WRLD]
R.I.P. to X, R.I.P. to Peep
R.I.P. to Mac, R.I.P. the beats
R.I.P. to anybody that want beef
R.I.P. to anybody that want beef
R.I.P. to all the niggas died in the street
R.I.P. to all the niggas died, rest in peace
Only thing I can't say is R.I.P. me
'Cause I'ma live forever, I put that on my life, B, uh
Flow go crazy
For niggas that's booling red, my flow go brazy
Shake like Haiti
Choppa on me, give your ass a plate
I don't give a fuck, I may just fuck your bitch today
Young nigga and I'm feeling rich today
Scratch him off, lil' lotto, no quick pick today
Burn a nigga like Jamaicans and incense today
Been the realest nigga since an infant, okay, uh
On these Eminem beats, I'm a beast
From the west to the east, I'm a freak in the sheets
Got your bitch and she got a real badass physique
I'ma fuck her one time while you beating your meat

[Chorus: Eminem]
I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?
'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?

[Verse 5: Eminem]
I'm like a head trip to listen to, 'cause I'm only giving you
Things you joke about with your friends inside your living room
The only difference is I got the balls to say it in front of y'all
And I don't gotta be false or sugarcoat it at all
I just get on the mic and spit it
And whether you like to admit it, I just shit it
Better than ninety percent of you rappers out can
Then you wonder: "How can kids eat up these albums like Valiums?"
It's funny, 'cause at the rate, I'm going, when I'm thirty
I'll be the only person in the nursing home flirting
Pinching nurse's asses when I'm jacking off with Jergens
And I'm jerking, but this whole bag of Viagra isn't working
And every single person is a Slim Shady lurking
He could be working at Burger King, spitting on your onion rings
Or in the parking lot, circling, screaming, "I don't give a fuck!"
With his windows down and his system up
So will the real Shady please stand up
And put one of those fingers on each hand up?
And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control
And one more time, loud as you can, how does it go?

[Chorus: Eminem]
I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?
'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?
'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?
'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
All you other Slim Shadys are just imitating
So won't the real Slim Shady please stand up
Please stand up, please stand up?

[Outro: Eminem]
Ha ha, I guess there's a Slim Shady in all of us
Fuck it, let's all stand up!