if i’m being honest, this is one of the only songs i’ve ever written that isn’t directly about a situation i’ve experienced firsthand. i think i can safely say i’ve never called anyone at 4am asking them to come over.
BUT what i can also honestly say is that i think it describes a situation that we can all relate to: making a fool of yourself over and over again because ur lonely and u miss somebody and u dont want to be alone with your racing thoughts. u text or call them because ur WEAK. and u are scared of what they’re doing or who they’re with.

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i wrote this on tour in phoenix. my alarm that day was set for 4:45pm so i wouldnt sleep past my soundcheck (tour is exhausting ! and i sleep rly late !)

but i woke up at 2pm and looked at the clock and decided sleeping until 4:45pm was dramatic. so i got up. the venue’s green room had a piano and when i walked in, quinn xcii was already sitting and coming up with melody ideas so i was like, ah, i should probably write too.

i was in a sad mood (haha !!) but instead of writing a super sad song, i felt like changing it up, mostly because i woke up with justin bieber stuck in my head (naturally).

so i put down those piano chords and started writing the song.

after my set in phoenix, i rushed back to the green room and sat, writing and recording demo vocal takes in the pockets of silence between songs in quinn xcii’s set.

after the show ended, we plugged my laptop into the venue sound system and listened to the very first demo over the speakers. honestly not much changed on the song between then and now.