[Verse 1: Addie Amick, David Michael Frank]
I woke up on the ground
I guess I shoulda kept that shit to myself
Turns out, I'm pretty good at runnin' my mouth
But not good enough
You know, when I go in, it's lights out
I couldn't hear a thing 'cause the song was too loud
Last night I had thirty-two teeth in my mouth
Some went away
Why'd you have to go and fucking ruin my day?

[Chorus: Both]
You're the reason why I got my ass kicked
But you're the only way to drown my sadness
This is my love/hate letter out to alcohol
You're the reason why I got my ass kicked

[Verse 2: Addie Amick, David Michael Frank]
I was laid out flat like a centerfold
Jakey and his partner drove me home
Lookin' in the mirror, something's wrong
Let me get my dentist on the phone
Found my keys, then I went back out
Someone asked me how it all went down
I remember like it's yesterday
I took a shot, took a shot, took a shot, took another shot
Fell right out my fuckin' chair, swingin' for his eye
Then a big chrome ring flew in from the side
I thought I died
Why'd you have to go and fuckin' ruin my night?

[Chorus: Both]
You're the reason why I got my ass kicked
But you're the only way to drown my sadness
This is my love/hate letter out to alcohol
You're the reason why I got my ass kicked

[Bridge: Both, Addie Amick]
I woke up on the ground (Ground)
Shoulda kept that shit to myself (Self)
Pretty good at runnin' my mouth
But not good enough
This is my love/hate letter out to alcohol
You're the reason why, you're the reason why
This is my love/hate letter out to alcohol
You're the reason why, you're the reason why

[Outro: Both]
You're the reason why I got my ass kicked
But you're the only way to drown my sadness
This is my love/hate letter out to alcohol
You're the reason why I got my ass kicked
You're the reason why I got my ass kicked