[Verse 1: Anastasia Douglas as Miley Cyrus, Mark Douglas as Liam Hemsworth & Mark Douglas as Billy Ray Cyrus]
I never been to no beach because that's where Jaws lives (duh-duh, duh-duh)
These tiny rocks are itchy under my ruffles and between my cheeks
Why did I come here? (Oh right, I remember)
It's where Thor's brother lives (my name's is Liam)
He's marrying me, so I'll try to blend in
(Hey Malibu neighbors, just makin' a music video)
I used to party all night, the sun made me mad (no, turn it off)
I had sad struggles, I lost a few puggles
It's hard growin' up with the same middle name as your dad
What? I like this jam
(This sounds like one of my tunes)

[Chorus: Anastasia Douglas as Miley Cyrus & Mark Douglas as Billy Ray Cyrus]
Daddy, shoo! (You ain't supposed to be here)
What did I do?
(Well for one, Daddy, you stepped on the chorus) of Malibu
Country roots (get it?), with underboob
(That's my cue to leave)
Bought my dog Stu (wake up Stu!)
(Oh no, not another one)

[Verse 2: Anastasia Douglas as Miley Cyrus, Mark Douglas as Billy Ray Cyrus & Mark Douglas as Noah Cyrus]
It's Noah's turn to say swear words, act rude and insane (what's up, big sis?)
Hey, can I borrow this camera to make my new sex tape? (just use your phone)
Fuck all you fuckers, I drink and smoke fucking weed (how original)
Noah, you need to mature and maybe when you get old...
Fuck you Daddy, this worked for Miley (hey!)
Y'all are ruining this (don't mess up my engagement), now the neighbors look pissed (take a picture, it'll last longer)
Both of y'all better git
(Okay, where was I? Beach song, here we go)
I brought this stick of balloons to show you I'm quirky
Maybe they'll make you forget all my twerking
Oh crap, why did I bring up twerking? I said it again (damn it)

[Chorus: Anastasia Douglas as Miley Cyrus, Mark Douglas as Billy Ray Cyrus & Mark Douglas as Noah Cyrus]
What's with the beach? What does it do?
(Oh, I don't care none) the beach has you
(Hey, check it out Miley) Malibu!
(Chug, chug, chug, chug)
I'm done with you
What did you do?
(Do me a favor would ya?)
Hold these balloons (OK)
Enjoy the view