Image via Ariana Grande
It’s no secret that Ariana Grande’s new album, thank u, next, draws heavily from the pop star’s life, including her high-profile romances. The project’s 9th track, “in my head,” clearly addresses a past relationship, but there’s been some debate over whether she’s singing about Mac Miller or Pete Davidson. Parts of the track could apply to either of them, but the songs overall tone and several specific lyrics seem to indicate that it’s about her relationship with Davidson.
Grande previously told fans that the track is about “being in love [with] a version of somebody you’ve created in your head. Falling for someone that they are not,” and it kicks off with a voiceover by Doug Middlebrook, one of Grande’s friends, who speaks on this concept in a voicemail:
Here’s the thing: you’re in love with a version of a person that you’ve created in your head, that you are prying to but cannot fix. Uh, the only thing you can fix is yourself. I love you, this has gone on way too long. Enough is enough. I’m two blocks away; I’m coming over
Grande’s relationship with Davidson began in May 2018 and quickly evolved into an engagement that ended abruptly in October. Although Davidson was already a well-known comedian and star on Saturday Night Live, his relationship with Grande turned him into a tabloid fixture, something she seems to reference on the song’s post-chorus:
Yeah, look at you, boy, I invented you
Your Gucci tennis shoes, runnin' from your issues
Davidson has been photographed by paparazzi wearing Gucci tennis shoes while out with Grande, a fact that her fans on Twitter quickly noticed:
On the track, Grande sings about seeking stability in her life, and projecting an image of perfection onto someone who couldn’t live up to her fantasy:
Falling, falling, needed something to believe in, oh
I thought that you were the one
But it was all in my head
These details seem to mirror her relationship with Davidson, whom she started dating shortly after breaking up with Mac Miller in 2018. The couple’s romance quickly became public, and they were engaged after dating for less than a month. Grande’s fans weren’t very supportive of the relationship, especially after Pete joked about her Manchester, England concert bombing and replacing her birth control with Tic Tacs. The song repeatedly references seeing someone as the opposite of their public image:
My imagination’s too creative
They see Cain and I see Abel
The imagery of “inventing” someone and finding refuge in a relationship also seem to offer the flip side to Grande’s perspective on “Pete Davidson,” her 2018 Sweetener track about their whirlwind romance:
I thought you into my life, look at my mind
No better place or a time, how they align
Universe must have my back, fell from the sky into my lap
And I know you know that you’re my soulmate and all that
There are details in the song that could apply to Miller, especially since she was open about her efforts to help him with his drug problems. The tone of “in my head,” however, seems too harsh to be about someone who recently passed away. Grande also removed a song from the album, titled “ReMeMber,” that was speculated to be about her relationship with Miller, saying that she decided she didn’t want to share it with the world.
Aside from name-checking Davidson on “thank u, next” and delivering a few pointed tweets Grande has mostly avoided talking about him since their break up last year. It seems that “in my head” may offer some clues as to how she’s feeling now.
Listen to the song above and catch up on all the lyrics to Ariana Grande’s “in my head” on Genius now.
