I Made It
SXYE Lyrics

I miss you for the three days you′re gone
I feel your absence strongly even when you're only gone for a short period of time

I'm happy when you listen to my songs
Your support and attentive listening brings me joy

You missed a lot of my self-hatred
When you're not around, I tend to dwell on my flaws and shortcomings

Good thing my lyrics are sadistic
My dark and twisted lyrics provide an outlet for my negative feelings

You wanna see me happier than I am
You have a desire for me to be happy, but it may not be feasible

But I don′t think we'll either understand
I think it's unlikely that we'll come to a mutual understanding on this issue

That no matter how long it's been
Even with the passage of time, I still miss you and the things that make you unique

I miss your eyes, your hair, your smile, your skin
I deeply long for your physical presence and the way it makes me feel

My jeans are ripped, my hair′s a mess
I'm not at my best right now, physically or emotionally

I wish we both had time to rest
We're both under a lot of stress and could use a break

I made it but you weren't there
I managed to get through a difficult time, but it was disheartening to do it alone

I shouldn't care, I shouldn′t care
I know I shouldn't put so much thought and emotion into this, but it's hard not to

Push the pressure point with your second joint
You challenge me and push my boundaries in a way that's both exciting and uncomfortable

I just don't wanna come off as boring
I don't want to be viewed as dull or uninteresting in your eyes

I could never ask what I want
It's difficult for me to express my desires and needs in our relationship

I′d lose your hand again and then you're gone
I fear that if I spoke up or took a risk, you might leave me for good

I lost my mind again
I'm struggling with my thoughts and emotions, as I often do

I tend to fall behind again
I often feel like I'm falling behind in life or in our relationship

And I don′t remember how
I don't remember how to pull myself out of this negative state

To regulate what words come out
I have trouble controlling what I say or write when I'm feeling overwhelmed

I tend to sing myself down
I have a tendency to write and sing about my struggles and hardships

I tend to write and write about my misfortunes
My misfortunes and struggles are often the subject of my creative expression

But I'm uncertain, cause
I'm not sure if expressing these negative feelings is ultimately healthy or harmful for me

I wish you let me have a chance
I wish I had a chance to connect with you in a deeper way

To laugh some more to hold your hand
I long for the intimacy and warmth of spending time with you, laughing and holding hands

I wish we talked some more online
I regret not having more opportunities to connect with you, even if just through digital communication

Just let me try, just let me try
Please give me a chance to prove myself and show you how much you mean to me