[AARON BURR]
How does an upstart Briton, best known for sittin' and
Jestin' from a desk in the middle of a
Forgotten slot on late night, far from Manhattan
Chattin' with Hollywood phonies
End up being the guy who hosts the Tonys?

[JOHN LAURENS]
CBS said, "This collision of theatre and television
Needs a risk-taker. It needs a rule breaker
It needs a troublemaker
A mover and a shaker
It needs that chubby dude from Into the Woods
Who played the Baker"

[THOMAS JEFFERSON]
Considering his pedigree, this choice is not a mystery
The One Man with Two Guv'nors was discovered in The History
Boys. With his talk show, networks honchos saw how this could be
A classic exercise in realizin' corporate synergy

[JAMES MADISON]
Of course, the host of Broadway's most preeminent affair is in
The spotlight, so his goal tonight is not to be embarassin'
To dodge the skewers of reviewers drawin' a comparison
To Tonys past, of telecasts they've seen Neil Patrick Harris in

[AARON BURR]
Well, he knows that you're excited and he feels the very same
'Cause he knows this night can bring you recognition and acclaim
'Cause the theatre's what he loves, it's the world from whence he came
Yes, the theatre's where he made his name. And his name is –

[JAMES CORDEN]
James Corden
My name is James Corden
And these are what I'll be awardin'
No! Just you wait, just you wait...