So this has been.my favorite song of OTEP's since it came out in 2004, and I always thought it was a song about a child's narrative of suffering in an abusive Christian home. But now that I am revisiting the lyrics, I am seeing something totally new.
This song could be gospel of John but from the perspective of Jesus.
Jesus was NOT having a good time up to and during the crucifixion. Everyone in the known world at the time looked to him with fear, admiration or disgust and he was constantly being asked questions. He spoke in "verses, prophesies and curses". He had made an enemy of the state, and believed the world was increasingly wicked and fallen from grace, or that he was in the "mouth of madness".
The spine of atlas is the structure that allows the titan to hold the world up. Jesus challenged the state and in doing so became a celebrated resistance figure. It also made him public enemy #1.
All of this happened simply because he was doing his thing, not because of any agenda he had or strategy.
And then he gets scourged (storm of thorns)
There are some plot holes here but I think it's an interesting interpretation.
Loneliness it shadows me
Quicker than darkness
Crawls to the surface of my skin
Visibly surrounded by it
Black is all I feel
So this is how it feels to be free
Surrounded by empty souls
Artificial courage used
And because so, once was mine
I walk this maze alone
Black is all I feel
So this is how it feels to be free
The man's beside himself
Man's below himself
Man's behind himself
Am I inside myself
Chaos and hate shadow me
Pain it fills me up
Only one thing makes me feel
Missing better half of me
Black is all I feel
So this is how it feels to be free
The man's beside himself
Man's below himself
Man's behind himself
Am I inside myself
Quicker than darkness
Crawls to the surface of my skin
Visibly surrounded by it
Black is all I feel
So this is how it feels to be free
Surrounded by empty souls
Artificial courage used
And because so, once was mine
I walk this maze alone
Black is all I feel
So this is how it feels to be free
The man's beside himself
Man's below himself
Man's behind himself
Am I inside myself
Chaos and hate shadow me
Pain it fills me up
Only one thing makes me feel
Missing better half of me
Black is all I feel
So this is how it feels to be free
The man's beside himself
Man's below himself
Man's behind himself
Am I inside myself
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Well, in my opinion this song is about being a young & maybe a little naive &/or introverted girl and finding yourself loving a man who is at first very charming, carefree & outgoing, and seems at first to be without limits, as in
"There was a time
you opened up every doorway
you didn't mind if everything
wasn't your way"
then that man starts to gradually become more introverted & shows their more possessive/obsessive side to you as the relationship progresses, even while they keep up the appearance of being carefree & outgoing to everyone else,
"Don't pull away
that goes against what you told me
I look in your eyes
I realize what you've sold me
is love in a vacuum"
so you confront them about the way they're acting and of course they deny it,
"I think you've changed
but you insist that
that's not true"
quite possibly they are an addict of some sort, my guess would be cocaine, &/or showing very obsessive behavior towards you (early on in the video for this song we see the man hanging a picture up, it is a very large portrait of Aimee & it is prominently displayed in his/their apartment for the duration of the song), thus their "love in a vacuum",
"You look so strange, so distant
that you're hardly you
Now I can see
how you have been acting different
You say it's me
but I know
that it isn't
it's love in a vacuum"
but still you are in love with them and don't want to leave them and you know that they are truly in love with you and they don't want you to leave them either, maybe they are convinced you can save them from themself, maybe they are so broken that the possibility of an overdose &/or suicide attempt is very real and you want to get through to them that their behavior not only dangerous but it is also just pissing you off and if they don't wise up they run the risk of loosing you, as in the lines
"You will be lonely
if you leave me alone", so you want to save them but can't get through to them due to the addiction &/or emotional problems they have,
"Love in a vacuum
and that's not enough
love in a vacuum
You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
You will be lonely
if you leave me alone
You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
it's just not enough"
you want them to understand that the love they are giving you is not enough when it is filtered through the vacuum of their drug addiction &/or emotional impairment,
"You will be lonely
you'll be the only one who feels this way
it's just not enough
and just wait
you will be lonely
Love in a vacuum
Love in a vacuum
and that's not enough
Love in a vacuum".
'Love In A Vacuum' for me is a hauntingly truthful acute argument on the loneliness of obsession and almost inevitable loss of love that follows people who are broken in some way or another; the obsessives, the coke heads, the drunks, addicts or the just-plain-old emotionally broken; a razor sharp, lyrically driven, deceptively poppy, yet ultimately-depressing-in-the-best-way song.
Quintessential Aimee Mann.
Corpse I Fell In Love With
Gadjits, The
Gadjits, The
He reuses the verse melody from the previous album's "Dirty Little Religion", the topics of the verses are all over the place, and he packs too many words into one line (goes to show...) and too few in another (it's pretty hard to find), and rhymes "Henley Regatta" with "Persona non grata", but gets away with it all as only he could.
Battle Royale
Word Alive, The
Word Alive, The
This song is def a twin to "Unfair" (a song she has been quoted as saying is about falling in love with someone who is already in a relationship) so it is presumably about the same person. Given the references to buying an apartment and not being able to see her love interest "after tonight," it's most likely that she's moving away and she'll "wait a day to break the bad news" (i.e. notifying him that she's leaving once she's already gone).
And, of course, the fact that she sees in him a fellow "idealist" and "dreamer" (terms commonly given to people with the INFP personality on the Myers–Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI)) portends that she'll always be left wondering if they would've been perfect together.
Bron-Y-Aur Stomp
Led Zeppelin
Led Zeppelin
This is about bronies. They communicate by stomping.
this is probably the most depressing sounding song i've ever heard.
@Wobbly toe Frogs may compete.
In my opinion this is Staley's most beautifully written lyric. I don't think he's alone in a sense of being by himself - he may very well be surrounded by other people - but he feels alone because he doesn't feel anything on the inside, it's all from the outside, crawling up to his skin. Only hate gets inside and fills him up to make him feel. So if he doesn't emotionally feel anything from the inside, he is not even inside of himself - he doesn't even have himself as a companion anymore, hence the title and the line, "missing better half of me".
@greg in an obvious state of depression he is
AM I INSIDE? No, Layne, but I wish you were. haha!
lol...hes kinda deceased though
Angry Sar only said that he WISHES he were.
sorry, SHE wishes he were here
I love this song. It's about being alone, and how people say that when you have noone you are 'free', and how much total bullshit that is. Also, it's describes the feeling of being incomplete with not having someone.
There is to a female backup singer on it.It would be Ann Wilson of Heart.She does backing on "Brother" and this song,"Am I Inside".
she also does that ghostly wailing on "Love Song" as well (only on CD).
The song is originally from the EP, Sap, It is written and sung by Layne, chorus by Ann Wilson of Heart, Layne, and Jerry Cantrell.
Great song! About loneliness and depression; above all, feeling alienated from those you thought were your friends. No matter where he goes or who he is with, he feels the same pain and he cannot escape it. His hurt is so severe that it takes on physical characteristics for him. It comes on quickly, covers him and it's so strong, it's visible.
I believe Layne was a highly intelligent individual who over-analyzed scenarios, friendships, family and relationships. He was very observant in that he watched people/friends and did a bit of self-discovery and soul-searching himself. He was extremely generous and sincere with a heart as big as he was and he expected more from others than he received. Unfortunately, in his eyes, most people just used him or befriended him because they wanted something from him and that was immensely heartbreaking for Layne. Layne felt there was no substance to the people around him and referred to them as "empty souls". They were just living life and going through the motions. There was no "heart", no "soul" to these people.
He is saying that he used to have this girl at one time and due to a break-up, she's no longer with him so he's currently walking this maze (earth) alone. "And because so, once was mine" (because she was his and she no longer is) "artificial courage used" alcohol and/or drugs are used to self-medicate and alleviate the pain that he is feeling. Artificial courage is similar to the term "liquid courage" which has always referred to alcohol.
It seems he only feels a "sense" of happiness when he's with his significant other, his "better half" (better half of me), Demri. His wording is, "the only thing that makes me 'feel'. He doesn't say, feel happy. I don't think he was ever happy. Taken from "Love, Hate, Love", is the line "I live for you, but I'm not alive." This shows how Layne truly feels, which is extremely poignant and clearly indicative of his heart and state of mind. Manic depression is devastating, not only to the person experiencing it, but to the family, friends, and loved ones of that person.
If Layne only knew what a GIANT he was and would become! But more importantly, the proper help needs to be available to treat the underlying problems, which is the reason people self-medicate.
Layne Staley will forever live on as a LEGEND in my eyes and to every AiC fan and I'm certain he is smiling down on each and every one of us. It was an honor, I'm sure, for anyone who knew him. Rest in LOVE, my friend.
@BrushAway really well written indepth interpretation, and most of it I am in agreement with (esp. regarding the song's theme of depression and the feeling of being all alone in dealing with it)
To me its right when the pain gets a little better so your able to think. And telling the story of how ppl didnt grasp the point and thought the opposite shit. it is the numb shock after that you cant even be angry about it. someone felt miserable but to everyone else was fine. or thats what they tried to think.
Good song from a great EP. I think it's about loneliness and confusion. "Chaos and hate shadow me". Maybe the person in this song has become bitter as a result of past relationships.. or even friendships.. Those are my thoughts, awesome song
the chorus is Miles beside himself, miles below himself and miles behind himself and after the first black is all i feel, it's, Built because soul once was mine!! sorry i just thought u guys might want to know! and my opinion is the song is very simple hes saying he's very lonely the only one that he'll let close to him is himself but the one other person would be demri thats who he wants b.c she takes his pain away
You guys seriously think that's Jerry singing? Layne had a very versatile voice which was capable of sounding soft, thank you. Listen to "Got Me Wrong." SERIOUSLY, how can you not tell that's him??? Listen to the way he says "darkness" in the beginning.
it's pretty obvious that's Layne